What to do when you don’t want to feel better


Ever have one of those days you just feel like being grumpy?

It’s one thing to be weighed down by our problems. It’s another story when those problems pile up. If they feel heavy enough, it might make more sense to just sit and sulk.

“Why bother fixing this one problem? It won’t fix the other five.”

“Right as I fixed my last problem, four others showed up. Fixing them isn’t worth it.”

“Fixing this problem in the past clearly hasn’t gotten me onstage at Steppenwolf. Speaking of which, I haven’t heard from my agent in a while.  Clearly the community hates me…”

Get the idea?

I caught myself stressing about a problem last week. (Don’t worry, Steppenwolf, it wasn’t about you.)  I was upset to the point that even doing my personal development wasn’t helping. I just wanted to sit under a blanket – a cold, wet, disgusting blanket of negativity. It wasn’t fun to sit under. Yet being under this blanket, admittedly, brought me an awful form of comfort. It almost made it okay to be upset, unhappy, stressed, etc.

While it’s okay to experience these feelings, it’s not okay to stay in this spot.  Luckily, I have an awesome life coach. Her name is Courtney Rioux. You might have heard me talk about her once or twice (or five hundred times).


True story: I’m less grumpy after clarity sessions with Courtney

In our private facebook group for #MyBigYear2016, I confessed my problem and how it made me feel. Courtney’s response hit a chord. An awesome chord (Hence why I promote her work so much): “Let’s not focus on the problems. Let’s focus on solutions.”

When I’m under this blanket, all I focus on are problems. I don’t even want to focus on solutions. Yet when I heard her words, I saw a glimmer of hope. It made me aware of all the opportunities I had to solve my problem. It shed a light on things that – under my stupid blanket – I didn’t even want to look at.

It made me start to be happier.

If you’re not happy, you’re not going to come out from under the blanket. You’re going to focus on negatives and think about how you don’t have the strength to come out. You won’t see the solutions, and you likely won’t consider being happier.

Find someone you can talk to. Take a break from your problem and do something to put yourself in a better mood. Give yourself something to look forward to. Regardless of what you decide, do what you can to make yourself happier. It’s different for everyone. If all else fails, realize there are people in our lives who love us exactly as we are. Being happy will make them happy. If you can’t do it for you, do it for them.

Tony Rossi 1

Saw my Great Uncle John last week in Boston! He definitely made me happy.

I don’t know what’s under your blanket. All I know is that if you’re reading this post, you’re someone who cares about doing something to make yourself happy. And that makes you awesome.

Don’t forget that.

Go get ‘em.

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