The biggest thing hold you back from success

As an actor and coach, I often have the lovely pleasure of watching others experience more success than I. In the past, I’ve resorted to the “Guess it’s meant to be for them and not me” mentality. Ever done that yourself?

As someone who helps others become the best and happiest version of themselves, I often hear thoughts holding people back – thoughts that simply aren’t true. How do I know this? Because I go through them myself quite often. It’s been the biggest reason why I make reading books, listening to audios, and working with coaches (such as Courtney Rioux) a non negotiable.

I’ve learned that many of us like to make up reasons in our head why things are the way they are and why we’re not where we want to be. It breaks my heart when I see my friends or others I talk to do the same thing. It’s why I write blogs, host periscopes, and make Sunday videos on facebook each week.

I can’t tell you why we make up these reasons in our head based on limited information. Perhaps someday I’ll know more about the subject. What I do know is, having learned this the hard way, that often the biggest thing holding us back is ourselves.

That, my friends, is the truth.

It’s not that you’re not talented. It’s not that you’re not deserving. It’s not that your friends advancing in your field ahead of you are better than you are. I might not know you personally. But if you found this post, I want you to know that you are just as capable and worthy as that person ahead of you. You just need to believe it yourself.

Start making that the story you tell yourself every day and every night, my friends.

At the same time, let’s get rid of the notion that a particular strategy “isn’t for you” before you’ve actually tried it – and I mean really tried it. What really pains me to see is someone working on a goal, continuing to fall short, but refusing to try a different method. If it helps, reframe your mindset. “I’m going to try failing at this for a while by doing (insert new strategy here).” It will take the pressure of having to feel good about this new approach. And let’s be honest – most of us don’t like change. So the beginning is going to feel weird. That’s okay.

Are your thoughts and limiting beliefs be holding you back? I’d love to chat with you one on one and see if I can help. Most of the coaching I do with others is free. If I can’t provide you with a solution, I also have resources and friends who might be able to help better than I.

So here’s my question to you: Are you ready to stop holding yourself back and start being happier?


I’m not always happy. But when I am….I’m probably taking a selfie. 

It’s go time.

Let’s go get ‘em, friends.


2 thoughts on “The biggest thing hold you back from success

  1. I was at an event where I was complimented in front of my peers and I did not allow myself to push or discredit the compliments in order to make my peers feel better. In the past I would have done that… Played it off like I did not deserve it. But I knew the compliments were validating all my focused work and so I sat there and took that moment in –accepting and acknowledging how far I had come. I was able to accept without feeling ‘better than’ because I know I’m not better than and it was not by me being special that I got praised but it was the work that I was putting in and I know everyone else is as capable. If people did not get the chance to see others excel then they/we would not know what is possible. It is seeing others excelling that inspires and motivates and gives us the opportunity to evaluate where we are and where we want to be. No doubt I have been on the other side of my event situation and saw someone else being honored for their work and that planted the seed for me to grow. I believed I could do it too and so I used my belief to propel me into action. It also allows me to look back and see that it is not a better than game but rather it is a domino effect of enrichment. It serves no one to discredit youself in a moment you are meant to shine so that others can see what’s possible. So I would add: Believe in yourself AND Take action (after action after action). And if you don’t believe in yourself take the action any way … We don’t experience a fit body unless we are taking the actions to a fit body. Then you start to see some definition in your muscles that you wouldn’t have believed before because it wasn’t yet there. Faith without action is dead. Faith is believing in what you don’t see. Have faith that you will reap what you sow.

    • I absolutely agree, Gena!

      Something I talked about in my Sunday video last week was how we fail to reach our goals if our desire is at a level 10, but our self esteem is at a 5. Self esteem has to be a high level and then we need to take action.

      Thanks for reading, my friend =)

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