The bitch that is social media (and how to deal with it)

Isn’t social media a bitch?

Let’s be honest – because I actually love that bitch – we all like to show our highlight reels.

There are a few times a year when I’m shouting to the roof tops how wonderful my life is on social. These times are when I visit home.

Screen Shot 2018-03-21 at 12.26.25 AM

Screen Shot 2018-03-21 at 12.26.43 AM

29426015_10156440862247450_1654991318809575424_o

Shoutout to my friend Heather – whom I first met in Chicago – for getting me into FENWAY FREAKING PARK! 

 

I love my Boston roots. I love seeing the people I love whom I can only see a few times a year. I love driving through curvy, hilly, roads that so much more enoyable because you’re sitting shotgun. Follow me on social and you know what to expect during these trips.

This most recent trip? No different. A 26 hour visit that surprised family – and even myself!  It taught me a lot regarding how to best take advantage of the little time you do have on trips like these. In a future post, I’ll share more about that.

Truth be told, I hit a really, really low moment during this most recent trip. And I think it’s worth talking about for those who think I have my shit together during times like this – or at all.

The #notperfect morning

This is the part where I tell you I’ve been paranoid about being sick lately….because I keep getting sick. And that morning I woke up with a sore throat…

I was sick. Again. On vacation. After just having a cold on my last vacation.

The #notperfect process

“Maybe it’s just allergies,” I thought.

I attempted my morning workout….

“NOPE. Not allergies. I’m sick and this is terrible.” And because this had been a recurring theme for me, I wasn’t just upset. I was PISSED. I was frustrated. I was….honestly, a little hopeless. I had a breakdown of tears before my shower. And during my shower. A few more after. I felt broken.

The ultimate negative chatter

Now, I always hear those negative voices in my head telling me I’m not enough. But this time – I was the negative chatter. I was telling every one of my imaginary nice voices to STFU. I didn’t want any positive motivation. I was pissed. Nothing was going to help. I kept thinking….

I don’t care if there’s a lesson in this.

I’m F-ing sick of lessons through setbacks.

I don’t care if this is something I’ll appreciate five years from now

I don’t care that others have it worse than me (even though I know it’s true)

I don’t want to “just be positive”

I’m mad and I’m going to stay that way.

I don’t want to know “that it’s all going to be okay”

Okay fine. I did know deep down that everything was going to be alright. I just didn’t know when. When you don’t have a timeline – it sucks. When you keep having repeating patterns show up in a really short time frame – it really sucks. When you keep having that repeating pattern show up in a short time frame and it keeps showing up during your vacation? Don’t even get me started……

And then….

It was over.

No seriously. The pain was over.

Sure, my throat was still dry. But after taking some ibuprofen? I was literally fine. That headache I felt? Gone a few minutes later. Next thing I knew, I was having lunch with my Dad in his office, meeting his coworkers, and enjoying the largest salad that I’ve ever had. (I might have added a few extra pieces of chicken knowing that Dad was paying…)

The thing was – I wasn’t actually sick!

Now allergies, on the other hand…..that’s a different story. But I wasn’t low in energy. I wasn’t aching all over. And when I ended up going for a long walk in Boston later? I was FINE.

I had freaked out for nothing.

The point?

The point is I didn’t talk about this at all on social media.

Last my friends saw – I was a happy freaking camper using #BostonYoureMyHome hashtags left and right.

I don’t like dumping dirty laundry on social media….

 

Example: Screaming baby on my flight back?! FML….

The truth: You’re on vacation. You’re on a freaking airplane. You’re fine.

 

Example: I JUST GOT TOWED! WTF?!

The truth: You’re about to go through an inconvenient couple of days. You’ll pay a fee. And then – you’ll be fine. In fact, a year from now – you’ll be laughing at this. You’re fine.

 

Example: Why are people so annoying?

The truth:  You are so annoying…..and you’re not fine….)

(Sorry. That last one was just for me. And I’ve been that annoying person, so I’ll stop talking….)

While I don’t love dumping dirty laundry onto others, I also believe in being honest. But when it comes to my health – I’m more private these days. I learned that posting about so much as a head cold can result in your peers thinking you only have three weeks to live…..long story short, I’ve become more quiet about certain things like this.

Again – the point???

The point is don’t believe everything you see.

The point is don’t believe that those awesome, happy, successful people are like that all the time.

Just because someone is happy in one area of their life doesn’t mean they’re happy in all areas.

Just because someone is in love doesn’t mean they’re fulfilled socially.

Just because someone has landed their dream job doesn’t mean they have their finances in order.

Just because someone has a plethora of friends doesn’t mean they’re happy romantically.

Just because your mentors are the “smartest people in the world” doesn’t mean they have all their shit together…..

This isn’t to discourage you. This is to remind you that you’re not alone.

The pros that you emulate? They struggle too.

Guys. We’re all in this together. We’re all part of the huge traffic jam that you see everyday after work. We’re all the people who can be laughing hysterically one minute and crying profusely the next. And we’re people who can flip our emotions in an instant – for better or worse.

You’re not alone. There’s nothing wrong with you. It’s okay to not feel okay all the time.

You are enough. Especially if you have flaws and quirks.

Let’s go get ‘em, my friends.

 

***   ***   ***

Got questions? Want to me to give an empowerment talk to your group or school? Email me: tony.rossi@gmail.com. 

***   ***   ***

Thanks for reading!

By the way, I’m Tony. I live in Chicago. (Duh.) I’m an actor and blogger living right up the street from Wrigley Field. 

My blog is here to help others take control and live a more authentically positive life on their terms. Since working with a coach and learning more about personal development, I’ve started sharing my learnings with others. (I have a lot…)

If we’ve never meet – shoot me a tweet!  Would love to hear how you found this 🙂You can also find me on instagramYouTube, or check out my actor website

Advertisements

This year sucked so far….until it didn’t anymore (How things flipped in 24 hours)

“I’m over 2018.”

Drink if you’ve said or hear that so far this year. (Preferably something caffeinated. Not alcoholic. C’mon guys, it’s morning….)

While I think we give too much attention and energy to a calendar date in order to justify our feelings of a “shitty time” or “season of suck,” I certainly was not off to a good start this year. Between Christmas and now, I’ve caught three colds. I also banged up my rib cage which is causing a plethora of discomfort and preventing me from doing my favorite workouts. (Shut up. I like working out…) And sleep? Ha! Let’s not talk about that right now….#sleepproblems

27908284_10100824321819819_4483698071652436182_o.jpg

 

Thankfully my new memory foam mattress toper is helping….Beaker, not so much. 

 

So last Saturday, as I was finishing up some work prior to a dreaded day job shift, I got a missed call. And a voicemail. And a text. (When you have all three, you know it’s important.) Turns out it was my stage manager. And I was going on for the role I was understudying. In six hours.

Say whaaaaaat?!

By Sunday night, I had gotten to perform twice at one of my favorite theatres, stayed up wayyy past my bed time (at the same said theatre), and got an outpour of love on social media from my peers when they heard the news.

Suddenly I was saying, “Wow, it’s been a really good year so far!”

….wait a minute.

Didn’t I just say that it had been a crappy year so far?

Yes, the health setbacks were frustrating. But I was feeling perfectly fine and healthy for my performances. And now that I can list “performed” on my resume, not to mention the cool updates I get to share with agents and casting directors?! Woo-hoo! Suddenly I felt very abundant.

All this is to say is that you never know when things can change unexpected. This also can go reverse. While this isn’t a reason to “wait for the other shoe to drop” when things are going well, it is a reason to be grateful for the good things as they come.

So, my friend, if you’re going through a struggle right now – I hear you. I really hear you. In fact, despite this awesome weekend, I still have some things to figure out. (Like making up for the hours I lost at the day job this weekend…..#actorproblems). Just know that I’m rooting for you in the meantime. And please for the love of god, don’t hole yourself up in your apartment and play the “woe is me” game. Instead, feel your feelings and reach out and talk to someone. If you’re into therapy (and I am) – perfect. But if not, an empathetic friend who won’t condescend you will do the trick.

Let’s all go get ‘em, this year, friends.

 

IMG_0797.JPG

“Hinter” runs at Steep Theatre until March 17th! 

***   ***   ***

Got questions? Want to me to give an empowerment talk to your group or school? Email me: tony.rossi@gmail.com. 

***   ***   ***

Thanks for reading!

By the way, I’m Tony. I live in Chicago. (Duh.) I’m an actor and blogger living right up the street from Wrigley Field. 

My blog is here to help others take control and live a more authentically positive life on their terms. Since working with a coach and learning more about personal development, I’ve started sharing my learnings with others. (I have a lot…)

If we’ve never meet – shoot me a tweet!  Would love to hear how you found this 🙂You can also find me on instagram, YouTube, or check out my actor website

 

How to stay positive when you’re skipping a Cubs game – that you were really looking forward to

Have I ever mentioned how much I love baseball?

 

10255951_10100117733463549_5310493680930150873_o

0605171822 (1)

These are a few of my favorite things

It’s my favorite activity that has nothing to do with my goals. And that’s coming from an entrepreneur/personal development junkie who struggles to make time for any such activities. But I make an exception for baseball.

And I’ve been craving some Cubs baseball. Especially lately.

The context: I had tickets for a game I was really excited about. May or may not have had a hot date (which I was equally excited about.) I had just skipped out on staying late for my Broken Nose Theatre cast party for “At the Table” due to other commitments. And I really, really wanted some baseball and beer…

Screen Shot 2017-08-30 at 12.16.08 PM.png

My last several facebook photos….all including “At the Table” pictures of cast, understudies, or social outings with said friends. (Yup. Even the one with the puppy.)

 

….and then I got sick.

……..WHY NOW?!

So friends. As I write this post (very deliriously, I might add) the day I’m supposed to go to the game, yet share insight after insight with my peers on how to be more positive and live an authentically positive life – how do you stay positive when this happens?

I got three tips for you:

  1. Get pissed. Seriously. You’re sick when you’re FINALLY free to do something fun. You think airy fairy positive thinking is going to make you feel better? HA! No. This sucks and you deserve to be in a bad mood if you want to be. 
  2. Put things into context. But obviously staying angry forever won’t help. And let’s be honest, other cool life stuff is going to happen. Like my friend’s wedding in a couple weeks. And the Red Sox game I’m going to see two days beforehand. And not to mention there’s another entire month of baseball left in a city with two baseball stadiums. One of which never sells out their games (even with their $10 tickets.) So put things into context: A year from now….are you even going to remember this happened? (Hint: Probably not.) 
  3. Really put things into context: I met a doctor recently who shared she wasn’t allowed to practice in the United States. Despite six intense years of medical school, her papers can’t be transferred here because her country kind of doesn’t like our country. (Not for reasons you might think, but I’m sure those aren’t helping either…) Add on top of this the fact that her family was stuck in her country surrounded by war, having no idea if they made it through the night. After hearing this story, a baseball game didn’t seem to be a big deal. 

(Note: As of a month ago, this doctor’s family is safe and out of the country!!) 

A note about putting things into context….

Your feelings still matter. When I had this insightful conversation with the doctor, she also validated my own feelings (though I didn’t specifically mention the game.)  Just because I’m comparing my situation to hers doesn’t mean I don’t get to feel bad about it. Her words – not mine.

Keep that in mind. The next time you’re feeling guilty that you had a shit day when there’s war and famine going on in another part of the world – that doesn’t mean we don’t get to express our own feelings that humans experience. I bring this up because while putting things into context helps me realistically and positively feel less bad about my own situation, it doesn’t mean I have to feel guilty that I’m feeling feelings. Ya know?? 

So in summary: 

-Be pissed (but don’t stay there) 

-Will this matter a year from now? 

-Put things into context

-Remember that your emotions are valid 

Go get ‘em. 

***   ***   ***

Thanks for reading, friends. 

If you don’t know me – I’m Tony. I live in Chicago. I’m an actor and blogger living right up the street from Wrigley Field. 

My blog is here to help others take control and live a more authentically positive life on their terms. Since working with a coach and learning more about personal development, I’ve started sharing my learnings with others. (I have a lot…)

-Wanna make sure you never miss a post? Click the “Follow” button in the right corner to enter your email and subscribe! 

-Wanna see more? Check out my actor website or YouTube channel

Get what you want…by not getting what you want

I like when things are perfect. 

While I promote being #notperfect on social media, I continue to get humbling reminders about how I’m still learning to be positive when a wrench gets thrown in my schedule. If things don’t go according to plan – like, exactly according to plan – I freak out and am convinced the day is ruined. 

Take yesterday morning, for example: I woke up. I found it wasn’t raining. I immediately decided I was going to bike to Steppenwolf Front Bar and do my work from there. I love Steppenwolf and knew I had to get out of my apartment to do work. Starbucks just wasn’t cutting it. I had my plan! I bundled up, put on my coat, packed my bag, and threw on my bike helmet. 

…and then realized it had started raining. 

#notperfect

I went back inside, contemplating what to do. I wasn’t pleased. But I had things to do. I decided to just start working from home.

…and proceeded to have one of my most productive mornings in a long time. 

Sometimes we get what we want by not getting what we originally wanted. 

Ever have your plans cancelled due to weather? Or perhaps a change in weekend activities when a friend bails on you? This is the concept in a nutshell. The cool thing is that not only does it teach us to control on the things we can control, but it can help us be more comfortable when this happens with bigger situations. 

I had an awesome plan to intern this summer at a place I really respect and admire. I thought it’d be great if I got it, and was pretty determined to get it. Long story short – I found out that the typical applicant is expected to meet some expectations that I didn’t meet. At first I was pretty upset. Until I remembered this concept. 

Here’s a way to look at your future change of plans, whatever they might be: “I can’t (work there this summer)? Interesting. I wonder what else is now available for me…

The more we grasp this concept, the better we can handle disappointments. The more we can handle disappointments, the more authentically positive we become. 

No bullshit. No faking. No suppressing. 

Doesn’t that sound fun? 

15977393_10100582948753379_4173865704438727702_n.jpg

One of my favorite reminders hanging up on my wall. (I kind of like sticky notes.)

Let’s go get ‘em, friends. 

________________________________________________________________

Tony is a theatre and film actor living in Chicago, just up the street from Wrigley Field 🙂 He loves helping others to become the happiest version of themselves so that they can live more fun, fulfilled lives on their terms. Contact him for a free one-on-one to see if he can help you with your own mindset and happiness in life at tony.rossi@gmail.com

PS – Rumor has it that he loves when you share his content with friends and family.

Why I Do Personal Development (with a story of my not-so-good morning)

My morning was going freaking fantastic. And then, it just wasn’t. 

Some context:

It was my first day back to my “Tony’s morning routine.” This is where I wake up early somewhere between 5-7am, listen to my morning meditation from Wendy Braun as I shower and change, write in my gratitude journal, and then eat my (healthy) chocolate oatmeal while I read a personal development book. (Right now I’m reading “Awaken the Giant Within” by Tony Robbins. Love it.) I do all of this before checking my phone, email, Facebook, or anything that might have something or someone wanting my attention. I want to be in a positive state before checking any of that. 

It. Was. Great. 

I had been working a day job the previous few days and didn’t get this routine. I was excited to be back. I proceeded then to catch up on emails and messages, drink my coffee, and put in some work towards my Beachbody coaching for a couple hours. I was having FUN! I felt a rush of adrenaline that I hadn’t felt in a few days. 

And then…..I worked out. 

Usually this is another part of my morning that I enjoy. Lately however I haven’t been able to workout without experiencing some symptoms after. It’s frustrating. And being a Beachbody coach, I like to share what I’m doing – which includes setbacks. That day I learned after that I still couldn’t finish a workout without experiencing symptoms after.

(Side note: No it’s not serious. Yes I’m okay. Yes, I will repeat this again and still get questions from friends and family asking if I’m okay…) 

I’m sharing this part because then….I got pissed. 

I’d share all the thoughts I said to myself that hour, but instead just pretend you see Tony Rossi doing the opposite of what he posts on social media when it comes to positivity….it’s not pretty. 

I was about to mindlessly scroll and throw a pity party until it was time to leave for work. Instead, realizing that this hasn’t helped at all in the past, I decided to check my folder in my Gmail titled “Personal Development” – filled with blogs and videos from my favorite people that help me be my happiest self. I found found a video from Andrea Schulman from Raise Your Vibration Today that I had yet to check out…..

STOP FEELING SORRY FOR YOURSELF  

…oh my. Okay then. 

It was a slap in the face that I needed. It gave me reminders THAT I HAD HEARD EARLIER THAT MORNING IN MY MORNING ROUTINE that I had completely forgotten about. (Sorry for shouting. We’ll get back to that). Then…I started to feel a little better. 

Personal development, positive reading, and self care isn’t this “one and done” thing. It’s like working out – you have to keep doing it if you want to keep the results you earned. 

So as you go about your day and wonder why it is you’re not feeling happier, more motivated, energized about life, etc ask yourself when the last time you read a positive book or listened to a positive audio. I don’t share this stuff because it’s cute (though some of my blog are pretty adorable.) I do it because I need it for myself. 

I hope you take advantage too, my friends. 

Let’s go get ‘em, yeah? 

3 Things I Learned From My Angry Neighbor

Isn’t it fun to share something at someone else’s expense? Look at all the live tweeting from other people’s arguments and conversations that have gone viral. Stories like these provide a lot of entertainment and amusement.

….but that’s not what this post is about. Yes, it’s a story about someone else. But it’s not to poke fun. It’s to share a lesson. I don’t know what was going on with my neighbor – perhaps she was having a really bad day. I can only imagine what my neighbors are writing about me in their blogs….

What happened:

Some work was being done on the apartment next door to mine. Workers were dropping bricks and rocks from a high roof, and they appeared to be hitting some cables attached to the building. Shortly after they began, a resident from the building came outside. She informed the men that the power had gone out, and was quick to share that she believed it was because of them.  Comments including, “You guys need to be more careful!” and “Bunch of morons….” followed by a slammed door ensured. And because she likes to keep her windows open (as do  I), I heard her telling someone “I have no idea what to do!”

To reiterate – I can’t tell you how many times I’ve shouted and cursed because of inconveniences in my apartment. (Unrelated to the building owners – they’re fantastic). I did, however, want to share three tips we can all learn from this situation:

1) If you want something, avoid confrontation.

390329_3997486331202_637650852_n

I was a bit confrontational that day…(Film: “Kidnapped and Hypnotized.” Writer and director: “Joe Campanella”) 

Have you ever wanted something from someone else and used anger and yelling as a tactic? (Yeah. Me too.) In the heat of the moment, being angry is the reasonable choice. That said, consider who you’re talking to. Often times, we’re yelling at someone whom we might want something from in the future. This applies to landlords, customer service reps, or friends and family members. The last thing you want is for them to fix the problem, resent you, and then find you need their help in the future.

2) Save your energy. Focus on solutions.

13006588_10100444330420629_754005123974551457_n

Coffee, baseball, and journaling a great solution to most problems…

Ever had a time where you were so busy being angry that you completely missed the problem being fixed? (Yeah. Me too.) My neighbor was too busy venting that she missed the workers looking at the cables and determining whether or not they had caused the accident in the first place. When we focus on problems, we’re making ourselves more angry. When we focus on the next steps, we’re both fixing the problem and making ourselves feel better.

3) Remember it’s temporary.

13248438_10100454531607369_8961527400835417499_o.jpg

Book credit: “The Greatest Salesman in the World.” Author: Og Mandino 

Guy who underlined and wrote all over the book: Yours Truly

Weather. Traffic. Running late. Loss of power. It’s all temporary. It eventually stops snowing. We eventually arrive to our destination. We eventually find the power restored.

And we’re not going to die.

And to update you all, their power has long been restored. In fact, I noticed the same neighbor has left her light on all day/night…..seems like a waste of power if you ask me….perhaps I should call the building workers….

…kidding.

 

Go get ‘em, guys.

Be Happier. Do What Works For You – Not Your Friends

I needed money.

I was on the phone with a very kind gentleman for an interview. The beginning of the conversation went fine. I shared my experience and qualifications. Shortly after, I got asked a series of questions?

What makes a good teammate?  

Why is it important to go out of your way in order to provide a pleasant experience for the customer?

Have you ever had a time where you encountered a difficult customer?

Talk about a time you experienced a conflict with a coworker.

By the time I was done answering, I wasn’t thinking about how I really needed money. All I could think of was how much I really, really didn’t want this job anymore. I didn’t like answering the questions. It made me focus on how much I didn’t want to be working jobs like this. It also made me think about my acting goals. Speaking of which…

I continued going about my acting goals. Not only was I still frustrated about finances, I also was getting down seeing others around me succeeding. Combine the two, and it did not make for a very happy Tony in Chicago. (See what I did there?)

There’s two points here

1) When we’re in a negative state, we’re going to attract more of what we don’t want. We tend to get what we think about most of the time. When we’re constantly upset about money, our career, or how others are doing better than us, we become aware of all the reasons why those things are true:

-We’ll find more expenses to worry about.

-We’ll focus on all of the acting jobs we didn’t book.

-We’ll start to notice lots of friends booking the job that we want.

Worst part: We’re going to stay broke and continue to be a struggling actor.

Being negative puts our focus on the negatives. The more we focus on them, the more of them we attract. This doesn’t mean there’s some magic force raining down problems and debt on your head. That would be silly. Rather, your subconscious mind is going to find every single reason why what you’re saying is true.

The good news is, this works the opposite. If you start focusing on things you’re grateful for, you’ll find the positives in more situations. This in turn will attract more positives and help you reach your goals.

2) What works for you might be different than what works for me. Some friends love waiting tables while they go about their acting goals. I found that didn’t work for me. When we focus too much on what our friends are doing, it’s putting our energy in the wrong place. It’s much better serving to ourselves when we focus on what action we can take in order to be happier. This might mean our goals take a little longer, which I’ve learned to be the case with the path I’ve chosen. It’s making me happier as I work towards those goals. I’d rather be happy now.

 

Take whatever path it is that works for you. Don’t worry about your friends. They’re on their path. They have different preferences for what lowers and raises their own vibration. (And if the word “vibration” doesn’t work for you – no sweat. Rephrase it however you need so that you focus on things that make you happy.

Put blinders on. Focus on your goals and your goals only. Do things that make you happy. You’ll be just fine.

Love you guys. Go get ‘em.

How we can turn life problems into gifts

The other day I got a bill.

There were several unpleasantries about this:

  • I had no idea this bill was coming
  • I really couldn’t afford this bill
  • Other monthly bills are about to increase
  • Did I mention my hours decreased at work because the holidays are over?

Initial thoughts of “This is rather unfortunate,” quickly escalated to, “MY LIFE IS TERRIBLE AND I’M NEVER GOING TO MAKE IT AS AN ACTOR.”

While I never would have admitted this at the time, this situation was a great lesson for me. Here were some takeaways:

Take a break from the problem:

“The higher the level of emotion, the lower your level of reasoning is.”

Eric Thomas, “Secrets to Success”

When we’re upset, we create a lot of lies in our head. They’re evil. Don’t listen to them.

Take a break and step away from the problem at hand. As much as we want to try and fix the problem right then and there, our irrational minds aren’t going to handle things very well. Furthermore, if it’s a problem that we literally can’t fix in that moment, we’re wasting our energy. Save it for when you can focus on what you can fix, rather than dwell on what you can’t.

Be open to an easy solution

In the heat of the moment we don’t consider this at all. In fact, many of us don’t consider this option even when we are a bit calmer. Sometimes life has answers for us that are only available if we’re willing to see them.

Right before bed, it popped in my head that there might be payment plan options. Not only that, but there was a note on the bill I completely missed. It mentioned to call them if you were having any issues making payments. (Shocker I didn’t see this during my tantrum.)

Pain can be a good thing

Change happens when the pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of change.”

– Tony Robbins

Ever fell off track with a diet? Stopped going to the gym? Started slacking on your acting goals? Chances are your current situation isn’t causing enough pain for you to do something about it.

This bill caused me pain. So much so that I didn’t take action on that one bill. I took action on several.

  • I called my healthcare provider and asked about cheaper options.
  • I chatted with Comcast about my internet package and asked about cheaper options.
  • I called about the bill and admitted I couldn’t afford to pay it.

The results were okay:

  • A rep walked me through new and cheaper healthcare options.
  • I negotiated my internet payment to only five dollars more a month. I also got cable included. We’re having a viewing party. (And I hope you’re okay with 60 of 75 channels in Espanol.)
  • I got things taken care of with the bill. I even paid it in full. Turns out….they made a mistake and it was about $200 higher than it was supposed to be 🙂

0105161414

I celebrated by crumbling the original bill and taking a selfie

Don’t get me wrong: Life doesn’t always give us the “Sorry, we messed up” card. That was just icing on the cake. The big takeaway here is that the pain of staying the same forced action that I wouldn’t have otherwise taken. It was only after this and stepping away from the problem temporarily that I was able to move forward and fix things. (Note: This becomes easier as you start to feed your mind with more positive books and materials.)

Above all else, just remember that when you’re stressed and upset, a bunch of lies will flood into your head. Don’t listen to them. I promise, you’re still awesome even when you’re stressed.

Go get ‘em.
_____________________________________________________

Know a few friends who might like this post? There’s a lovely share option. Don’t do it just for me. Do it for the others who you know will gain value from it. They’ll be glad you did. 

Be a Victor – Not a Victim

The only thing better than when life is going good is when life is going great. Sometimes you’re booking jobs left and right, earning enough income to quit your survival job, and all you can focus on is flowers, sunshine, and the thought of puppies. (Who doesn’t love pupples?)

But sometimes it doesn’t.

Sometimes life throws you curveballs. Not just one curveball. Several curveballs. In fact, after the eighth curveball, you can’t even focus on the plethora of good things going on in your life. Sure, you’ve done enough personal development to realize that you’re choosing to see the negatives over the positives. But when there are SO MANY FREAKING CURVEBALLS, seeing just one positive becomes a chore.

It’s been a rough few days for me. I feel like I’ve been seeing nothing but curveballs. And there is a plethora of wine in my apartment that looks incredibly lonely.

… but I’m not touching the wine. Eric Thomas would be disappointed in me.

TGIM

Check Eric Thomas out on facebook

Eric is a motivational speaker and published author. He has his PhD and is inspiring people every day. Though he certainly had his share of curveballs: He was a high school dropout. He even lived on the streets for a period of time. He hit rock bottom. But today he’s on top of the world.

Eric Thomas

Or go here to read some of his quotes!

I’ve made a point to listen to one of Eric’s “Thank God It’s Monday” videos every day. Here’s what I’ve gotten from them:

1) You are not a victim. When things aren’t going well, we tend to fall into the victim’s mentality. This is when we think about how much things suck, as opposed to what we can do to fix them. It’s an easy trap to fall into, but it’s tricky to get out. Take responsibility for what happened. Focus on what you can do to make your situation better. Taking small, simple steps will make you feel a whole lot better than a bottle of wine ever will.

(Champagne, of course, is another story..)

2) Your situation is temporary. When Eric was homeless, he knew that he wasn’t going to be homeless forever. When we start to focus on how things inevitably are going to be okay, we start to feel a little better about our current situation. Sometimes it even leads to ideas on how to fix things.

Regardless of your circumstances, remember that you’re not a victim. You’re a victor. Now go make the rest of your life the best of your life.

Then watch this video. Then call me. We’ll order some champagne.